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sierciaWhat an amazing, powerful movie.
The movie is essentially about the struggle of a couple after their 18 (?) year old son is murdered. Compounding their loss is the fact that he was their only child, and at least the wife of the couple wanted more children. There's one scene, after the murder where the mother and another friend are looking at pictures, and this other woman is bragging about her grandchildren, and you can see all of this pain coursing through the mother's face.
That's one of my biggest fears of having only one child - that sense of putting all your eggs in one basket; that we'll raise Hannah, and then something will happen to her after it's too late to have any more kids, and we'll just be there, with nothing to show for years of child-raising except a big empty hole. It sounds so stupid, to have more kids as a way of hedging your bets, but there it is.
People say that there's no pain worse than that of losing a child. I wouldn't know, I've never had it happen. Given my blase attitude toward death (a matter for another time), I'm not sure how it would affect me. I'd be inclined to say that it wouldn't be the life-stopping staggering load of grief that it would be for most people. Maybe I'm wrong, but I don't think so, unless it left me with nothing. While I realize no one child can replace another, I feel as if having more kids would lessen the grief, as compared to losing your only; especially after you had spent so many years, and were just about finished with the work, standing ready to reap the benefits (like grandchildren).
We won't even discuss the fear in my heart of hearts that my cosmic payback for occasionally wishing we hadn't had Widget is that she'll be killed in a car accident when she a teenager, because well, one just mustn't speak of these things.
After all else is said and done, I didn't like how they ended the movie. Violence begets violence, in a never ending circle of pain and sorrow doesn't do it for me. I would have much rather have sen the father take steps towards Natalie and her sons, re-affirming life and love instead of violence and death (It could have been done haltingly and painfully, without being treacly and sappy). The scene when the little boy is watching the father on his boat, and doesn't say anything, and just rides away almost broke my heart. I would have liked to see the mother find the strength to face seeing her son's killer, ot at the very least, I would have preferred they just drive him out of town. The thought that she goaded her husband into killing the guy soured me on the entire movie - for her to think that he could do that without having it ruin him is preposterous; for her to not care makes her hateful and horrible beyond words, and drives up any sympathy I might have had for her. Obviously, there's no way this movie could have a happy ending, but, geez, couldn't it have at least stayed more true to the rest of the movie?
The movie is essentially about the struggle of a couple after their 18 (?) year old son is murdered. Compounding their loss is the fact that he was their only child, and at least the wife of the couple wanted more children. There's one scene, after the murder where the mother and another friend are looking at pictures, and this other woman is bragging about her grandchildren, and you can see all of this pain coursing through the mother's face.
That's one of my biggest fears of having only one child - that sense of putting all your eggs in one basket; that we'll raise Hannah, and then something will happen to her after it's too late to have any more kids, and we'll just be there, with nothing to show for years of child-raising except a big empty hole. It sounds so stupid, to have more kids as a way of hedging your bets, but there it is.
People say that there's no pain worse than that of losing a child. I wouldn't know, I've never had it happen. Given my blase attitude toward death (a matter for another time), I'm not sure how it would affect me. I'd be inclined to say that it wouldn't be the life-stopping staggering load of grief that it would be for most people. Maybe I'm wrong, but I don't think so, unless it left me with nothing. While I realize no one child can replace another, I feel as if having more kids would lessen the grief, as compared to losing your only; especially after you had spent so many years, and were just about finished with the work, standing ready to reap the benefits (like grandchildren).
We won't even discuss the fear in my heart of hearts that my cosmic payback for occasionally wishing we hadn't had Widget is that she'll be killed in a car accident when she a teenager, because well, one just mustn't speak of these things.
After all else is said and done, I didn't like how they ended the movie. Violence begets violence, in a never ending circle of pain and sorrow doesn't do it for me. I would have much rather have sen the father take steps towards Natalie and her sons, re-affirming life and love instead of violence and death (It could have been done haltingly and painfully, without being treacly and sappy). The scene when the little boy is watching the father on his boat, and doesn't say anything, and just rides away almost broke my heart. I would have liked to see the mother find the strength to face seeing her son's killer, ot at the very least, I would have preferred they just drive him out of town. The thought that she goaded her husband into killing the guy soured me on the entire movie - for her to think that he could do that without having it ruin him is preposterous; for her to not care makes her hateful and horrible beyond words, and drives up any sympathy I might have had for her. Obviously, there's no way this movie could have a happy ending, but, geez, couldn't it have at least stayed more true to the rest of the movie?
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Re: What movie?
Date: 2002-10-19 05:47 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2002-10-21 06:32 pm (UTC)Trust me, ALL parents think that now and then. If the cosmos punished parents for thinking such things, then I would have been smited long ago.
Of course, I also know that mothers are not reassured by such statements.
It's part of a Mother's job to worry about her children. It's the way it is.